The addictive process - the loss of the spirit of life and for living
A Releasing Your Unlimited Creativity discussion topic
Copyright 2009 by K. Ferlic, † All Rights Reserved
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Our consciousness reflected in our creative spirit is passionate to express itself and show exactly who it is and it has chooses to express itself thought the use of the physical body. When our creative spirit is not allowed to express itself it feels the pain of separation from its desired creation, from its beloved, from its other half of being, from what it perceives as its true soul mate and is its reflection in manifested form.
It is the premise of the energy consciousness model that the root of many addictions ultimately arise because individuals try and numb the pain that exist because of our separation from the desired creation of our creative spirit. That is, the pain resulting from how our consciousness want to live as a unique creative individual and how they have been taught to live by everyone around them. In the denial of our creative passion, they have to live in the pain of separation from the world our creative passion longs to create.
Many of us move into the mind and occupy ourselves with seeking some object of success that will make us successful in life and/or looking for the source of our pain outside themselves to be satisfied by something externally. The object of success, however our mind defines it, then causes us to move into the world to fulfill that objective in the expectation and hope that as we find success, or rather fulfill our definition of success, our inner longings will go away and we will find satisfaction.
For some, this journey into success can satisfy them our entire life before the discover the illusion that what they have been seeking is not satisfying. Some never see the illusion of success for what it is and are puzzled why they never find satisfaction. Others find our expectations of success end early in life and without finding an effective substitute, they become depressed and no longer are inspired by life and living itself. Still others imply numb what they feel through some other type of addiction other than thinking.
The addictive process - the loss of the spirit of life and for living
The addictive process as seen from a creativity perspective is simply the result of the denial of self and the truth that flows within our being. The addiction is the result of the lost of alignment with our creative life energy, a deny of our creative living process, or the loss of the passion of life and for living and the subsequent attempt and habit that is created to numb or deny the pain that results. The addiction is seen and experienced as a loss of our being and we lose the understanding of who and what we are. Often we always tired and even depressed.
From a creativity perspective, any addiction or addictive behavior that does not allow us to be in the spontaneous and innocent childlike play of discovery and exploration of our internal and external worlds is learned behavior. Each of us are born into this creative state of play and we lose it by how we learn to response to life. We each learn to live in ways in which we deny the truth of our being and in doing so we lose our ability to play. The addictive response we develop is learned. The particular type of addiction we use, or rather the choice of the addiction, is genetically and physiologically determined. In these addictive patterns our spirit - the life process the passion for life and for living - dies much before our body does in an addiction. Although we each carry a variety of addictive response. We are forced to deal with the addiction that is killing us the fastest. Medical intervention occurs when the addiction becomes live threatening.
Here again, to understand addictions from a creative perspective it needs to be clearly understood our natural state of being, our essence, the very fabric of which we are made has the desire to be creative and express its creativity. Our consciousness expresses that creativity in what can be best described as the pure spontaneous and innocent childlike play of discovery and exploration. In this state we feel a passion for life and for living and they live in fully alignment with the flow of our creative life energy, fully embracing our creative living process. The patterns that we develop in response to life that lead to addictive behavior are learned in our schools, our churches, our families, our world, and in everything around us and there is a broad spectrum of experiences that cause us to deny the expression of what and what we are.
To fall down in our play and scratch our knee can be the beginning of a pattern of denying the full expression of our creative life energy. Similarly, to be stuck or beaten into submission physical or emotionally by a care giver is nothing other than traumatic fully capable of create the traditional concept of soul loss that causes a part of our being never to return unless someone consciously goes and retrieves it. Here there is an instantaneous and significant denial of the expression of our truth. However, in most cases we learn and are taught to lose our ability to play by how we are taught to live in the world. In essence, any thing that causes us to deny who and what we are and does not allow us to freely express ourselves but forces, coerces or influences us to live in some other way for whatever reason lays the seeds of addictive behavior for it causes us to develop a response pattern to life in which we deny the truth of our being.
In many ways from a creativity perspective and our ability to embrace life, the way humanity has chosen to live in this world causes us to become an addict and develop addictive behavior. We are encouraged, influenced, and coerced to live according to what those in authority, our care givers or others who hold power over us desire. If we are not addicted in some way to denying the truth of our being we really donít fit into the culture we have created for we all are encouraged to deny who we are to meet the expectations of others. The world we live in is an addictive process so everything in it invites us back into our addiction. Whenever we are with anyone we are invited to be a certain way and rarely allowed to be in the spontaneity of our own being.
This is what most people donít realize. We are a creative living process flowing in response to life and when we are unable to flow freely we hurt a part of our own being. Most people have only the minimal awareness that a creative living process lies within each of our beings. Our society is basically an addictive culture for it wants us to be and act in a relatively prescribed and "acceptable" way. In this regard, addictions must be understood within the entire environment in which the addiction forms. Each culture, each situation will have it own unique way it desire us to respond. To understand the exact nature and extent of our addictive patterns we have to look at the organizational structure and/or the community in which we live. They will tell us much how we are expected to deny our truth. People work with addictions in isolation as if it is the only addiction we need to address. We fail to understand the addictive behavior is a response to life and to the environment. We donít look at the entire process that causes it and realize such that if we address the addiction and not its root, another issue will arise in a different way. The root cause is why we had to learn to respond to life the way we did. Without fixing the root cause all we will do is cause an addictive behavior to surface some where else in some other way.
An addiction is something in which we become powerless to prevent the denial of our internal processes for two reasons. One is the habit is stronger and more powerful that our consciousness to be mindful and aware and what we can feel. The second reason is that situation of life itself is often asking us to deny who we are. In any case, it interferes with our normal life process. Namely, the addictive behavior or pattern does not allow us to be live true to the truth of our being and respond to life in the way we feel and are lead to respond as opposed to how we think we should respond. In this regard an addiction is anything we are attempted to lie about. We lie in that we use it to cover what we feel or to prevent us from having to act on what we feel. Rather we act in the addictive behavior rather than acting spontaneously.
The problem with addictions is that it alters our consciousness and affects our thinking process. It keeps us out of touch with our internal information system. Our body wisdom and intuitive guidance are always surfacing information if we are open to listening. However, mind is always jumping in and biasing whatever information is presented before we are able to become consciously aware of exactly what we are feeling or sensing. Or, it causes us to be so absorbed in our thinking we never pay attention to what is presented. It numbs our feelings and sensations. Addictions shuts off the intuitive process and our connection with all that is for it is our body wisdom and intuitive guidance that arise because of how our energy permeates all of reality. Addictions can be said to cut off our connection with spirituality and our own internal processes of life. It basically cut off our intuitive guidance and that which we know within and in doing so, cuts our connection with the Source of life within ourselves.
In many traditional views addictions are seen to cut off what we call our spirituality and causes us to live in separation. As we live in separation, we begin to believe we are separate and over time and we feed our thinking as opposed to feeling. In doing so we develop an addiction to thinking and we develop entire spiritual traditions and philosophies on how the human has some how sinned, become unworthy and has somehow been separated from the Source of his being and the Creator. Yet it all stems from our thinking and how we do and do not allow ourselves to live the truth of what we feel and know internally. We deny what we feel and continually raise the threshold until our body screams at us in some form of pain. Yet rather than explore the true nature of the pain we have, we find some way to numb it or deny it.
In numbing our pain, there are external substances that we can ingest and they give rise to the external addictions. The ingestive addictions are the chemicals and drugs that we use to numb ourselves. However there are also process addictions that are the products of our thinking and represent the things and activity that we do in how we are processing and viewing our lives internally. In process addictions, we become addicted to the process and the content of whatever it is we do loses its meaning. The process no longer give feeling.
Thinking is one such addiction. There is a thinking addiction most of us use and in fact have been taught to use. We are always thinking and having thoughts but have lost the feeling that goes with the thoughts. Remember energy and consciousness are one and the same thing. If we are aware and allow ourselves to be sensitive enough, we can feel each and every thought we have. It is much like a like a ritual when the ritual loses its meaning. If we willing choose to do the ritual as opposed to being directed to do so, when we first do it there are feelings that go with the ritual. Sometimes the feeling is an anxiety that we will somehow do the ritual wrong. Nevertheless, we feel that ritual and we feel what we are doing and saying. However, in time, or if we are somehow not present, we do the ritual only to do the ritual rather than what it really means and we no longer feel the ritual and/or are present to the ritual.
So too with everything we think and do. Whether it is work, play, prayer, sex, or any other activity, the activity becomes devoid of real feelings and if there is feeling, it is superficial. It is no where near the depth and breath of the feelings we first felt for mind simply steps in to control since it thinks it knows what to expect - that is, it has been there before.
An interesting aspect of process addictions and behaviors that they donít allow is to get to know ourselves or another for addictions are keeping us from intimacy. The intimacy to know and feel ourselves and what we sense. To be intimate with something is to be familiar and knowledgeable of the essential, intrinsic and inner most aspects of its nature. That intimacy can only be achieved by a pronounced closeness and study. Addictions cause us to remain superficial and unaware of the depth and breath of what we experiencing for it is only in feeling that we capable of seeing and experiencing the unseen realms of reality and our own nature.
In many ways, all addictions appear to be an escape from intimacy and when we canít be intimate with ourselves we canít be intimate with another. We can't give what we don't have. Being intimate with ourselves means knowing our selves and feeling ourselves at our deepest levels and, in being intimate with ourselves, we create the possibility of being intimate with another. If we canít be intimate with ourselves to know ourselves we eliminate the possibility of being intimate with anyone else. To think we can be intimate with another when we donít know the depth and breath of our own being and intimate with ourselves is an illusion for we cannot give what we donít have. To become truly intimate with another we must first become intimate with ourselves.
Addictions are what allow us to live in the world of illusion and cause us to live in two different worlds. The world that is real and the world we create with our addictions. When we are in our addictive behavior or in our addiction and are unable to feel we are in what can only be described as schizophrenic behavior. Schizophrenic as the origin of the world describes from its Greek roots; schizein - to split and phren - mind. Namely we are of a split mind. This is we have separated that which is our heart and our ability to feel traditionally characterized by the right side of the brain from the mind and how we perceive life and how we think we have to be and act tradition characterized by the left and analytical side of the brain. Heart says one thing and head says another and in that separation is pain. It is that pain of separation that lies at the root of the addictive behavior. Yet rather than live to heal the separation our world continually asks us to deny what we feel.
The question is how many different ways are we expected to be other than who we really are. The answer of course, is we are expected to be other than who we are as many times as there are different people in our life for each has an expectation for us to fulfill. Whether we consciously realizes it or not and or believes it or not, we all have expectation of others in our life and of course, we put expectations on them. No one really consciously allows another to be complete free to be true to our being. It is tremendously difficult for we think too much to view another totally free of our own thinking and the older we get that harder it tends to be. But then, since no one has really been allowed to be free and true to who they are, the question then becomes, "Do we know who we are, or are we living the illusion we have been taught and passed on by all those who have educated us in life and have never been free themselves to show us an example of what it is to live in the freedom of our own being?". Remember, we cannot give what we do not have and we could only be given what our care givers or teacher had.